One Down, One To Go

Survived the rehearsal. She was late.. Figures. The minister did tease her about not being late tomorrow. We had to practice walking down the aisle twice because the other girls couldn't understand how to walk slowly enough. It's a very small church so they want to stretch it out a bit. Then we had to practice walking out with the guys. Then the vows. The minister was about to leave without even telling us where we could get ready, and my sister wasn't going to ask. I kind of pushed her to do it, though. She needs to learn to speak up for herself. My mom thinks I'm crazy because I said Kelly should wait to get dressed until she gets to the church because it's supposed to pour tomorrow. Hopefully they'll listen to me. I know I won't get dressed until I'm there, under the circumstances.

At the very last minute, they changed where the rehearsal dinner would be. Chinese buffet. Pretty low class place. Our grandparents weren't even invited, even though they should have been.

It looks like I am going to her house tomorrow morning. My cousin's husband will swing by to pick me up and drop us off at my parents' house. My brother will be driving my sister, cousin, and myself to the church. Hopefully, I can use this to make sure we get there on time!

Brian will be on his own with Margaret... And if she's anything like she has been today, good luck to him!! She's been super cranky. And refusing to eat. No fever and she's not stuffed up or anything so I don't think she's sick. Just cranky (although not crying a lot...just not cooperating). We'll probably drop her off at my MIL's house on the way to the reception. Good luck to her, too! She's never watched Margaret before so this should be interesting! It's only one day...it shouldn't affect her permanently, right? ;)

A Lot On My Mind

With how busy I've been lately, I have a lot on my mind and no time to think it all out. Brian has been working 60+ hours a week right now, as well as 6 days a week. He leaves by 7:30AM and usually isn't home until 7:30PM or so. I have very little time to myself these days. Once he gets home, I have to make dinner, then I have to clean up from dinner and wash all of Margaret's bottles while he takes care of her last feeding of the day. He puts her down for the night, and I'm still taking care of the things that need to be done. Most nights, I don't get to go to sleep until 11 or 11:30PM. Then I'm up again at 6AM and the cycle starts all over again. I'm exhausted and starting to get frantic about all the things I need to do that aren't getting done. But alas, this is the life of a mommy.

My sister's wedding is in 2 days. I am the matron of honor in this wedding. It will be a very busy next 2 days and I'm looking forward to it being over. I ended up being her wedding planner, making many of her decisions for her. I also was responsible for making the bouquets, something I wasn't able to finish sooner because I could not get her to decide on the ribbon she wanted. Now, with 2 days to go, I still have to finish them. There just hasn't been any time. Brian has promised to take care of dinner and Margaret tonight so I can take care of that.

I feel like I'm falling apart. First my neck was bothering me for a few days last week. It spread into my right shoulder when I turned my head certain ways. Now, I'm having pain in my right ribcage just under the bust on the side. It doesn't hurt when I touch it - the pain is from within. It's worse when I breathe deeply, cough, and when I sit/lay in certain positions. Last night, I was only able to get sleep by taking Tylenol and laying on my left side. By morning, it was gone... but it's starting up again. I have no idea what it could be, and no time to address it right now. I know that's highly irresponsible, but it's the truth. I'm also secretly hoping it will go away on its own. Then that would mean it wasn't anything serious, right?

Somebody has been smoking in the 3 family house in which we reside. I can smell it in our apartment and I can't seem to get the smell out of my nose. It's making me sick to my stomach and I don't know what to do about it. Brian insists he doesn't smell it and that I'm being oversensitive. Perhaps he's right since I can still smell it now and I'm at work... But it bothers me. If I can smell it, that means Margaret is breathing it in. I'm not happy about that at all. I go to great lengths to avoid smokers for her health, and it just plain sucks that after all my efforts, she gets exposed in our own home. Unfortunately, we can't afford to move right now. And even if we could, there is no way to escape what others do outside their own homes anyway. Unless you're in the middle of a large piece of land, you can't escape it. It's frustrating and irritating to be so helpless like this when my daughter's health is at stake. And it's everywhere we go. People in cars next to you at traffic lights, people in front of stores you want to shop in, people just walking by your house... and the worst are the people who do it with their children right there, held captive by their parents and forced to smoke. That should be considered child endangerment. There should be criminal charges and consequences for that. (SIGH)

So many more random thoughts, so little time....

im·ma·ture

adj.
Not fully grown or developed. See Synonyms at young.
Marked by or suggesting a lack of normal maturity: silly, immature behavior (as defined by dictionary.com)

One expects that once s/he reaches adulthood, exposure to immature behavior would be minimized. Those catty cliques from adolescence would dissipate and the participants would grow up. I guess these expectations only live on in our imaginations, however, because it appears that as one grows older, the immaturity of others intensifies. The catty behavior grows into downright cruelty. And the victims suffer greatly.

I have recently witnessed some of these attacks by immature adults. I am appalled at the lengths one would go through to subject another to such cruelty. And disappointed. When in the evolution of humankind did we derail this way? When was it determined that some would, rather than mature as they age, instead regress to childhood, and hence perpetually remain in that infantile mental state?

Regardless of how it has occurred, it pains me so to see one subjected to this unnecessary behavior. A great friend of mine has suffered much in her life, and in no way deserves what she has received from these vicious character attacks. I stand by her and ask that those who are her true friends do the same.

After all, how would you feel if you were the victim and your friends turned away from you in your time of need?

A Day At The Fair

Margaret went to her first fair today. It was actually my birthday present since Brian isn't a fan of fairs (doesn't like the smell of the animals). Since it was my birthday, though, he agreed to go. Margaret was more interested in the people than the animals, but she behaved really well. I didn't HAVE to take her out of the stroller at any point like I usually have to when we're at the mall. But I did take her out in the animal buildings so she'd have a better look at them. Maybe next year she'll appreciate it more. In any case, the weather was beautiful. It was the perfect day to go to the fair. Skies were blue and cloudless and the temps got up to almost 80 degrees. So unlike an October day, but we enjoyed it nonetheless. We even went for a walk at the nature preserve with our dog Becky in the afternoon.

My Cutie Pie

I just can't help it... I have to show her off! :)

We're planning on going to a local fair this weekend - Margaret's first fair. I'm hoping she's in a mood to tolerate it. I can't wait to see her reaction to the animals! Too bad she's too young to try the fair fare. :) (Not that it's exactly something we should be rushing into, given the lack of nutritional value to that food...) I know she won't appreciate it much this year, but I'd like to make it an annual tradition in our family. Something for her to eventually look forward to every year. I'm looking forward to starting many family traditions, now.

I Love This Picture

She wasn't too fond of the hat and her reactions to it were hysterical ( more photos in her September 2005 album ).

Yesterday, the head teacher at daycare told me that she swears Margaret said "hi" last week. She said she was feeding another baby in the glider and Margaret was in the Exersaucer, staring intently at her. She felt bad that she couldn't hold Margaret, so she said, "Hi, Maggie!" and Margaret said "hi" back! She said she wasn't sure if she should tell me because she was afraid I'd think she's crazy, but the other teacher in the room as well as the director of the center both heard her say it. :) I believe it because I swear she's said "yeah" to me before when we were talking (poor English, I know, but I do tend to use the word often when we're talking), as well as "mama" (but that was a totally accidental "mamamamamama"). I couldn't be prouder!

School Pictures

We got the school pictures back on Thursday. They were taken on September 9, 2005. I think they could have been better (I really hate where they put her bow, for example) but they're not too bad. :)

In contract, on the sidebar is a picture I took that morning before bringing Margaret to daycare.

Still sniffly today. Poor thing. She screamed for a good hour or so this morning, too. No idea what's wrong with her, other than her sniffly nose. She doesn't have a fever, but I gave her a little Tylenol for the apparent pain she's having. And I'm encouraging naps as much as possible today. She doesn't always cooperate, but she definitely needs it right now. In fact, I think I'll go join her...