TGIF!

What a week! I really just wanted to spend the weekend shut away in my apartment, as far away from the roads as possible. But I had a regular OB appointment this afternoon so I had to brave the roads once more. And believe it or not, I ALMOST got hit...again!! I've decided my truck has earned the name "Christine." It obviously has a death wish and is communicating this to the other vehicles. Luckily, I escaped unscathed...but driving is just not the same. I tense up at every traffic light, every time there are 2 lanes, and any time somebody gets too close to me. I used to enjoy driving and now it's the last thing I want to do.

Needless to say, my blood pressure was a little up at the appointment. 122/84, which isn't bad (in fact, it's lower than the readings I used to get when I first started going there), but it is higher than what I've had lately. The nurse weighed me on this ancient scale today that I am sure was not calibrated. Isn't the needle supposed to be in the middle when it's on 0? This needle was floored. I ended up with a total gain (according to the dysfunctional scale) of 20 lbs. I expected a lecture from the Dr. W, but actually, she was ecstatic. She said I was doing great with my weight gain, which really puzzled me. I reminded her that she told me she didn't want me going over 20 lbs. She told me that, for most women, she'll tell them they shouldn't gain more than 10 lbs, for example, and they'll gain 60 lbs. I guess when you look at it that way, I am doing well. I still hate seeing those numbers creep up though. After that she measured my belly and we listened to Peep's heart (yup, still beating away!) and that was about it. We went over my birth plan (no problems there). Then she told me that starting at my next appointment (2 weeks from now) they would start giving me a copy of my records to carry with me at all times, in case I go into labor and have to go to the hospital. Somehow, that really scared me. I keep thinking in terms of weeks... I have 9 weeks 6 days left. Peep can't possibly be born much before that, right? So preparing for a birth at any time starting at 32 weeks is a bit freaky to me. I can't even get in for my hospital tour until May 14th! Heck, I still don't know how to get to the hospital!

I Am Not Driving Anymore

That's it, I think it's time to hang up my keys. I got hit. Again. Twice in just a little over a week.

I was driving back to work from lunch and there was a utility truck parked all the way to the right under the underpass. So we were taking turns going around the truck. I ended up letting 3 cars go (mainly because nobody would let me go) when I started to go through the underpass. This big blue pickup truck starts coming from the other side and all I could think was, "There isn't enough room! Can't he see? There isn't enough room!" Well, he didn't care. He went barreling through, taking off my driver's side mirror in the process. I was stunned. I stopped on the spot, looking to see if he at least pulled over so I could get his info. I turned around and saw him accelerating, fleeing the scene as quickly as he could. I couldn't even get the license plate number.

Shock. I pulled through the underpass, and then parked in front of the utility truck. An elderly gentleman had seen the whole thing and went into the road to retrieve my mirror. I asked him if he saw the license plate, but he hadn't.

I didn't know what to do. I called Brian and proceeded to bawl almost the second he picked up the phone. Now what? No description, no license plate, and more damage to my truck. There was nothing to do. He told me to calm down and just go back to work. To not worry about it.

Just what I need... I now have to PAY to replace the mirror (because we have a $1000 deductible, so if I put in a claim, they won't pay anyway) for something that ISN'T EVEN MY FAULT! As it is, I've been nervous driving since what happened last week. And now this.

I'm turning in my license and keys.

CONGRATULATIONS LAUREN & JOHN!!!

I just got the call this morning from Lauren.

Welcome to the world, Ava Day!!!!!
Born 10:14PM April 13, 2005 ~ 7 lbs 6 oz

Lauren will give the long version of what happened when she has a chance, I'm sure. But this is what she told me:

She got to 5 cm in hard labor when the doctor decided to do a C-section because Ava still had not dropped. It's a good thing, too, because she would have been born sunny side up (face up, for those who are not familiar...quite a painful type of labor and delivery). Lauren also added that an epidural is a wonderful thing. :D

Congratulations again, Lauren & John! We look forward to the many, many pictures of Ava that you will share with us!!!

Lauren Update!!!!

I am happy to report that I got the call from Lauren! They were FINALLY able to get her in for her induction, so she's on her way to the hospital! Best wishes, Lauren!! Here's hoping Pea comes quickly and easily!!

Intolerance

I guess this is the week that just won't get any better. This morning I was greeted at work with discussion of how morally wrong it is for Connecticut to allow civil unions for gay couples. I don't know how many of you out there are familiar with this controversy, but I guess Connecticut is the first state to seek this right without request from its residents, so it's been in the news quite a bit. It's a step in the right direction, I guess. But what about marriage?

Here I sit, listening to the so-called "Christians" in the room vehemently protest this subject. The Catholic states that she will not vote for any representative who votes in favor. The "born-again" Christian agrees. Then they start all over again about how it's wrong and how this country is going down the tubes. If this goes on all day, I may lose my mind... I'm already close to the edge as it is.

I guess I'm just too progressive for the environment in which I work. I don't believe in defining love as only being for those who are of opposite sexes. If you truly love somebody, it doesn't matter. Just like it doesn't matter if you're black, white, green, red, whatever, it shouldn't matter if you're male-female or female-female or male-male. Love is love. What's mine should be yours. Why should I be entitled to benefits because I'm married to my husband but others are denied those same benefits because their relationship is outside the scope of what's accepted? Their love isn't any less than my love for my husband. So why deny them? As I said, civil union is a start...but what about marriage? Why is it okay to distinguish one kind of relationship for one group and another kind for another group? We're taught not to discriminate based on age, race, creed, educational background, mental disability, physical disability, etc. for just about everything in this country, so why is it okay to discriminate in this manner based sexual orientation? Why do they preach tolerance and then act so intolerant? It's just not right...

It's also because of this extreme hypocrisy that I shifted away from my religious upbringing long ago. Yes, not everyone feels this way. But considering I am constantly surrounded by those who not only do, but are very vocal about it, it's easy to see why I would feel that wasn't the right place for me. I don't know what is...but I can't associate myself with any group that would preach love and then fight to define love as only being acceptable if it's between a man and a woman. A group that teaches "judge not, lest ye be judged" yet is full of those who are open and free with their judgments. Whatever happened to "love they neighbor"? I guess it went to the wayside when we became the Puritanical society we are today...

EDITED TO ADD: I want to add that, at least from what I learned in college, marriage was *not* originally a religious sacrament. I believe that didn't happen until quite a few centuries after Christ. This is something I keep in mind all the time... Originally, marriage was essentially a sales contract. Here's my daughter and I'll pay you in cows, chickens, and land to take her...PLEASE! Seriously, though, knowledge of this history of marriage colors my viewpoint here. The other part of it is that we as a society continually use the Christian definition of many things (marriage included, in this case). Yes, this country was founded by Christians, HOWEVER there is supposed to be separation of church and state in government. Governments defining marriage based on the current teachings that it is a holy sacrament in the Christian church sounds like an overstepping of boundaries, to me. We do live in a country that allows freedom of religion to its citizens, after all, so why use the narrow definition from one religion for rules when the rules apply to ALL citizens of this country, whether that is their belief system or not?

I am glad that I have this forum to speak my mind openly. I also appreciate that those who visit have no intention of sparking a debate here. I thank you for your tolerance of my viewpoint here.

Bad Day

Well, bad couple of days. I'm starting to get irritable and quick to anger. I have been so even-keeled over this pregnancy that this is really driving me crazy. Yesterday while still on vacation, I got all frustrated because I couldn't find anything fun to do while Brian was skiing. I didn't feel like driving around anymore, shopping wasn't any fun because I can't find anything for me and we don't know if Peep is a she or he so I wasn't going to spend a lot of money while 2 states away on him/her (I have enough gender neutral stuff, after all). I did find a Motherhood Maternity outlet...they had all of 5 things in my size. So I headed back to get Brian at the time we pre-determined and he decided to take another hour to get back to the car, even though I radioed him when I got there. I was pretty livid by the time he got there..especially since I was having wicked hot flashes and I couldn't even keep the windows in the car open because of the high winds blowing sand around in the parking lot.

Today it continued. I had an eye doctor's appointment at 12:30PM. I arrived at 12:20PM and the assistant took me in right away to do the preliminaries, but I didn't see the doctor until 1:30PM. We're allowed 1 hour for doctors' appointments at work without it being charged to our sick time...obviously, I had to charge some of it to sick time, which frustrated me. Then the assistant couldn't figure out how to charge part of my contacts to insurance, and the other one couldn't figure out my address. She typed up a new ledger card with my name misspelled. I went to Fashion Bug after work hoping to find some clothes, because I'm having a bit of a clothes crisis now. Yes, they have maternity...but nothing in my size. GRRRRRR! I came home, took the dog out, and she refused to pee. GRRRRR! I flipped out and threw the clothes in our laundry basket across our bedroom, totally p'd off about nothing fitting (did I mention that I didn't have a chance to laundry when I got home so I had to wear too-small underwear all day?). The state of our apartment didn't help matters any. So I gave the dog a bath, did dishes, and dusted. I got Brian to vacuum 2 rooms (and he's much more thorough than I am) but he also decided to take apart the vacuum at one point because it wasn't working well enough.

I was starting to feel better when we got a call at 9PM from a number I didn't recognize. I shouldn't have answered, but I did anyway. It was the woman I had the accident with last week. She started by asking me when I would report the accident to my insurance company. I should have picked up on where it was going then, but I didn't. So I told her no, I wasn't planning on it because I wasn't planning on putting in a claim. Silence was her response while she tried to compute. It turns out she was under the impression that *I* was at fault for the accident. She tells me that she ran into someone today who told her I ran the red light (the light was *yellow* when I went through it, as I already told the officer because I have such a guilty conscience that I couldn't help myself). She asked me what happened because she didn't even know what did, and I once again explained the situation, just as I had told the officer. She apparently has fender damage and (I assume) was planning on putting in the claim to *my* insurance company but said, "I guess I'll just call mine." That's when I said, "I don't know what the officer told you, but when he gave me the report, he said you were at fault and I was to call *your* insurance company to put in the claim. I decided it wasn't worth the hassle for some scratches on the bumper, though, so I didn't call them." I have a feeling this won't go away. I got off the phone and Brian gave me a hard time for admitting that the light was yellow when I went through it because she could try to sue me now. I lost it and started bawling. I've had enough. As if today wasn't bad enough, now this comes back yet again. Why won't it go away? It wasn't my fault, I didn't ask for it, but now I have to keep dealing with it. And I can tell where it's going...the next thing will be a letter from her attorney. I don't think I was wrong for not calling the insurance company. I wasn't going to put in a claim, so why bother, you know? It wasn't my fault, after all, so why give my insurance a chance to raise my rates? I was told in the past, actually, that you only call your own insurance if it was your fault, so why bother? I have the police report, but what else? If she sues me now (which is the absolute last thing I need... I will entirely lose it if that happens), I'll have to fight it. I'll lose time at work (which means losing time with Peep since I'll have to give up vacation time that I would have used for maternity leave) all because of an accident THAT ISN'T EVEN MY FAULT!!!!

Can I just curl up in a ball and stay there then next 2 months?

Checking In From New Hampshire

It's so nice to get away! We got up here pretty late last night due to our silly insistence on going the scenic route. Didn't even get in to the condo until around 8PM and we arrived at my favorite restaurant (Woodstock Station) at 9PM for dinner. That was a big mistake. They have live entertainment on weekend nights, and it had just started. It was very loud and quite annoying, especially considering the performers were within 20 feet of our table. On top of that, since smoking is allowed in New Hampshire (I forgot about that...no smoking allowed in restaurants in Connecticut) and the lounge was attached to the dining area, it got quite smokey in there. Brian didn't seem to notice, but I did and it was making me SICK! The service was terrible, even though there were only 4 other tables of people. And the food wasn't even that great. I was extremely disappointed. I don't think that's my favorite restaurant anymore. :(

Sleeping in a strange place is always hard on me. Usually the problem is the quiet or the strange noises I'm not used to. Noise wasn't a problem for me at the condo because there's a waterfall directly behind the unit. No kidding! Since I normally sleep with a white noise machine on, this was perfect. However, I couldn't get my internal thermostat under control (I kept getting too hot), so I still didn't sleep well.

This morning we went to our favorite breakfast spot. Ironically, it's a restaurant owned and operated by the same people as my (now former) favorite dinner spot. They're even in the same historic building! Breakfast was fantastic! Everybody gets homemade sticky buns with their meals, plus bread made from the spent grains used at their brewery. Yummy! Then it was time to drop Brian off and start my adventure.

The scenery on the way from Cannon Mountain to North Conway was beautiful. But my shopping trip was disappointing. I can't shop for clothes, and everything else makes me feel guilty since I know we need to buy baby things. I bought a poster for Brian, some gourmet dog treats for Becky, and a sundress (yes, another dress!) for Peep at the Gap outlet, but that was it. I could have used some maternity clothes but neither the Gap nor Old Navy outlets had any. :( So I headed back to get Brian.

Dinner was at my 2nd (now 1st, I think) favorite restaurant, the Common Man. What's ironic is that while it's called the Common Man, the fare is mostly haughty-taughty. Brian and I are both picky eaters so it's amazing that we would like this place, but the service is great and they have some unique quirks. Like cheese and crackers for everyone. And everyone gets some of their homemade white chocolate. I had a white chocolate martini the first time we ate there (obviously some time ago) but I couldn't have that today, so I had white chocolate mousse for dessert. YUM! Then it was back to the condo, which is where I am now.

Pictures:

Waterfall in Crawford Notch


Mount Washington Resort (with Mount Washington in the background)


Mount Washington


Me in front of the waterfall behind the condo